do guys with small dicks even attempt to pursue romantic relationships?
The nurse told me they're using the same medicine that killed michael jackson.
Now that you're back together are you gonna tell him you set his stuff on fire?
I just picked up my chili cheese fries off the ground ate them, and then licked up the cheese that was still on the concrete. Thank you Jagerbombs
If you feel like laying around and watching a movie, that's where I'll be for the next several hours not moving, blaming others, and generally feeling sorry for myself.
I sent him an 18 page sext. He's going to have a good morning.
And. I know i am a gay man cause when i saw the pic of his cock his feet were in it and i am like what the fuck?
Dude, chad is laying across the room, violently, passionately, pornographicly eating something and I seriously think the 'some thing' is fighting back.
I feel like he's mythological. Like you just had lunch with the Loch Ness Monster of hotness
My most recent midlife crisis involved eating a doughnut in 30 seconds but taking 5 minutes to do half a shot of whiskey, then deciding I wasn't going to finish it.
Please tell me you woke up next to the hot one cause his ugly friend is still snoring in my bed and my favorite panties are ripped.
Wingwoman of the year. I'll buy you dinner tonight and a new thong. It was THAT good.
What guy invites over a booty call, gets all naked and then when the real fun begins and a condom is needed, claims to not have one? And wears socks THE entire time?
My dad told me to bring weed to easter Sunday dinner..
I didn't want dick. I wanted spaghetti.
Wanna guess where my charger was last night.....in my cooler with my beer. I put it in there because I knew I would never forget my beer.
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