like what am i supposed to say "im thinking of how bad that sex was"?
Some guy said that sham wows were the same as regular shammys. needless to say you had to be restrained. you kept trying to 'slap chop' him.
how many americans can say they have been laid before eating their first big mac?
just lying in bed drinking beer with a straw waiting for motivation. why?
For her birthday she wants to, " try something different with our butts a funnel and a bottle of whiskey"
Is a wave an appropriate goodbye when your one night stand wakes up and walks out towards the door while you are looking through the garbage for the evidence of a condom?
He came home all fucked up crying slammed his bedroom door and all we could hear for about three hours was THIS ISN'T GONA RUIN MYLIFe what happend
I told him I got this chick pregnant and he has to get a new wingman
How exactly does one go about seducing an older, possibly blind gentleman?
i wore just an American flag as my costume-huge success. 20 people pledged allegiance to my ass including a senior frat boy at the keg. God bless America.
I took out the emergency phone in the elevator and replaced it with a bottle of vodka. The game is simple, do a shot for the number of the floor you're going to. Best suggestion box tip ever.
My feelings for him are donzo molonzo but I can't turn down a pierced penis...
We almost ended up sober because of u!!
Compositionally, that's actually a really nice picture.
And your penis looks really nice too.
she just punched him in the balls in front of everyone and yelled "YOU SEE WHAT YOU MADE ME DO"
He looked so uninterested when the stripper was slapping him. Now his roommates are harassing me about how crazy our sex must be.
Randomize
