I wish I could punch you in the face.
After he proceded to violently molest my tits until 9 am i snuck out of his room only to meet his mother downstairs, who informed me she heard the giant sexfest going on in the room next to them.. this was before she called us both "chickenshits".. worst walk of shame ever.
Michelle and I recorded her bunny humping it's little rubber black ball.
I just heard these 2 kids from flint and Detroit arguing over whose economy is worse... It's really sad what passes for competition in Michigan these days
Just tried my new showerhead. Sex with Brian will never be the same.
I think need to divide my DVD collection into "movies I've seen" and "movies I've only seen during sex"
I woke up with my bra stapled to the ceiling, her dad was in the hallway winking at me. I was the less drunk of the bunch.
I am not even close to finishing violently masturbating over that video.
I think my vagina is phsycic. All day it tingled and then BAM Channing Tatums look alike fucks me like ive never been fucked in my life.
It's almost like a boob-text, but it's not. Because it was live. And you were showing a bunch of people.
Just resonded to a booty call with "how much effort is required on my part?" I think I've finally reached the point of smoking too much pot
Waking up in a NH rest stop and reading through my texts is definitely a familiar low
I fucked him twice and then he set me up with his teammate. This kid does wonders for me
Look at us. Planning our business meeting. Including snacks like shrooms & trail mix.
They gave my sperm a pep talk after they found out we were trying.to have.a baby.
Randomize