yo im tryna cop a beej tonight
Lol i'z typing this with my 962 nose
962=my?
Yeah.i
is not sure whether or not everyone at the club last night calling me a-easy is a good thing?
I think I just made patron unclassy I bought limes at a gas station and for salt we are using gas station packets of salt
Dude you spent the last hour of the night in the bathroom crying, asking someone why you will never be as smart as Mr.Feeney from boy meets world.
there was so much ham clogging the tub drain.. he said it was ok he has a cleaning lady
Apparently he's taking the slut he cheated on me with on a cruise for her birthday. THAT COULD HAVE BEEN ME. TITANTIC STYLE.
What are you doing and how can I add sex in there
what's the appropriate greeting for someone whose bed you've had sex with someone else in?
Just got a Lifeproof case for Christmas so hold on and tell me how my shower nudes look
Are you drunk texting me again or are you just being your regular stupid self?
yes
Vomit your little heart out. You've got a long day tomorrow
I think next time I give head I'm gonna try making the chewbacca noise.
I look forward to it
you fell asleep with her panties on your face. how are you surprised??
i'm not sure you can trust me in a car with 20 dozen donuts
Randomize
