We all need desperate help. Maybe we should just become a group of people who walk around town and shit in peoples air vents
I'm down.
It's kind of sad that your greatest accomplishment today is that you stood up and didn't fall down.
I come up with the best drinking games while babysitting
sometimes when i'm drunk i choose the spanish option on the ATM to challenge myself.
did we cross streams again? the only thing I remember is seeing a dick
the point of no return was when you "drugged" his drink with glitter. face-planting on his dick was beyond.
I wish I could rewind to my 8th birthday instead. I wanna wake up, eat as much cake as I want, and have a Transformers birthday party without someone judging me.
ALSO, bringing a stapler to the bar is a good idea
she asked him to cuddle cuz she was cold and instead he got up, moved the space heater to her side of the bed, and went back to sleep
I sang "A Whole New World" while I took his virginity
That is awesome that you did that.
I need something for rope burns and an inner ear infection. Separate incidents, FYI..
You sent me a snapchat of you hugging a beer with the caption "best friend"
And why in he fuck did I get 'dick' in Romanian tattooed on my forearm
You were licking skittles to check if they were "halucinateizers" so no, you are not leaving the house while on antibiotics.
My dad told me that my grandparents are giving me $20,000 and my actual response was "do you know how many kittens I could buy with that?!?"
Randomize
