we went to that german restaurant and drank out of the boots. Then I threw up into one
Crosby and Malkin: Two girls, one cup.
i want two things in life...emily to stop talking and a block of cheese.
dude she licked ball and has every Are you afraid of the dark episode on dvd
lock that shit down
I just spent a chunk of my Christmas money on Plan B. I don't think that's what my relatives had mind when they said "spend it wisely", but hey, it was a good investment considering the bad life choices i made last night.
I kindof just wanted to go downstairs and let his dad know how good his son was at sex
The light burnt out and he thinks the power is out in the whole house. He is cooking a hog dog over two candles. I'm gonna see if he'll make me one
The guy at the bar repeatedly told us he was an off duty cop from out of town, that to normal people would be the time where you stop asking him to smoke a blunt with us
By the power invested in me i promise you hot wedding sex at my wedding.
Nobody feels the need to text me back. Men. And I sent myself a message saying nakedness. I'm all the man I need.
Come to this bar
But I'm full of food.
MAKE ME FULL OF YOUR DICK
ORGASMS AND PIZZA
PIZZA AND ORGASMS
I get dinner and bf perks from the one guy. But dick with no commitment from the other. I’m living my best life.
I gave him a hand job in the parking lot... now he thinks we're meant for each other...
Ps can u get with my cousin? He's a freshman at uconn and he's very attractive but like were related....
Randomize
