You should really figure out how to get me a picture that will pop up on my phone when you call
Just upload a picture of Bea Arthur. That's what my soul looks like these days
My mom was talking about how protein is essential to strong bones and then I told her, I'll give you protein.
How unfortunate for your Mom.
he pointed at my clit and asked with a confused face, 'whats this thingy??"
even the sluttiest version of myself will not go down on him
Yeah getting kicked out of the bar at 1 pm really set the tone for the day.
Resolution for 2011: blow jobs are a privilege, not a right.
Just wondering did you put mouse traps and brownies on my porch?
I've reached the slutty point of no return. And it feels like multiple orgasms and coke lines
Im going..... Drinking all day and hand jobs from 18yr old emo rich girls that are just trying to get back at mom and dad for being to protective...SOLD
Now go get drunk with your fam and get back into ur christmas groove. No time for gonnorhea
WELL THEN WHAT DAY IS IT?!?! This whole having to choose between ruining my future and ruining my liver is totally killing my vibe
When I got home he was in his underpants on the couch, eating pop tarts and crying while watching Voltron.
i spent my Thursday drinking before noon and not wearing pants
Pumped to get "pass out-wake up in Berlin-buy a chinchilla" drunk?
Like bruh, I’m a free range girlfriend
Randomize