If there was an emoticon for a sad penis, i would send it to you
thanks for not screaming that I'm pregnant when that guy was giving me his number.
You said you wanted to go to louisiana and get arrested by Steven segal
RIP Summer 2010. God knows it had to be one of us..
I'm deleting all the photos of dicks off my phone. This relationship could be serious
Just witnessed a bar fight started by a guy wearing a construction vest cuz he didn't like the other guys shirt
would you say our friendship is at the "help each other shave animal patterns in each other's pubes" phase?
Although I commend your efforts to keep my penis away from her, your sister is now booty walking up my stairs. Good game though, good game.
Bathtub drinking tim. I have no pool so I work with what I have
We're pretty much just dating until one of our ex's wants us back
Now I have to set an alarm for less than 6 hours from now to wake her up, get her showered and get her to her first day of tutoring a kid from her church. WTF is my life?
Please call us Steph is okay but missing phone wallet tooth
I feel like a girl who eats her problems away with fast food.
When all else fails, you can always look down at your enormous penis.
I'm the girl holding the bag of goldfish
His parents then knew me as the blackout who took care of him and stole his watch
Randomize
