Britney fell asleep on the couch in the foier, got up stripped then pissed on the floor. Then got dressed and went to sleep in it. Also downstairs toilet clogged. Not me. I will be gone by the time you get home from work. Have fun.
Don't use my boy Weezy to support your whoreish tendencies.
i need to find a birthday card for her that tells her how happy i am that i can now legally bang her
I wasted some perfectly good semen on her
just found out this city drinks more beer during oktoberfest than rhode island does in a year.. i'm never leaving
Just found a peacock feather in my car. Should I be the least bit concerned about this?
He slow fucked me. Doggy style. On a porch. You never slow fuck doggy style. Its a law. A LAW.
He stood up, threw the bag of bud between me and Tory, yelled "Fight" and then ran upstairs for the pizza
Had sex with one of the guys from Ireland. Celebrating st pattys early.
His dick is as big as my 7" heels... Awkwardness is forgotten.
Awareness is good for change and all, but ignorance is bliss. I like bliss.
The only math I use in every day life is figuring out how much I can spend on alcohol and still have money to pay my bills. High school lied to us.
I should become a firefighter. Who uses his cock to fight fires. Like a Superhero.
It wasn't exactly a dick pic. It was more like a body shot with a hint of wiener.
sorry for showing your butt to the bar
sorry for licking your cheek
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