i bet jesus would rush if he went to usc
is it bad that I sent her a picture of my penis on her husbands birthday?
I will fuck a handful of worms if you hold them
I'm glad I have good healthy relationships with my one night stands
His little brother just walked in, asked me if I'd blown his brother yet and then announced that he and his friends were going to play outside so we could play too.
Now I'm at the gym and I never want to leave. It's a combo of adderall and endorphins and I don't want it to go away
I met his dad. Turns out he was a one nighter from the nurses conference in Vegas. Not sure how to handle this one.
Clearly, you already have. Both of them.
Idk I've been drinking all day and they're having me blow shit up. Like dont let the drunk chick play with fire and explosives. Common sense 101. I will fuck something up
I'm pretty sure the Jahovah's witness only came to our door because the front says "Twerk Or Treat"
If I could I'd magically teleport drugs and alcohol to you. Like a bad decision fairy.
Walking back to my car from the campus library and just saw a Nuva Ring on the sidewalk. If that doesn't scream college life, idk what does.
no its a draw, weve been through this, when were keeping score on getting laid i get a plus 1 handicap each week because of your British accent! its only fair!
dude, he literally lasted one minute. and i paid 8 dollars for cabs.
Funniest thing happened to Chloe! She talked the bf into a mmf threesome, and he loudly and enthusiastically discovered he was gay during it. Whole dorm literally heard it happen.Well funny for me. Chloe not so much.
I don’t know what language he speaks but I know my boobs will translate just fine
I’m looking forward to few days of international relations
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