ps i'm pretty sure i was blacked out when we hooked up? good thing i was w. you and not an actual diddler or an organ harvester
Hahaha. Shut up you were blacked out my ass. U were str8 mixin it up with urs truly like it was ur J-O-B
I've slept with so many tools that you'd think my pussy was Home Depot.
a cemetary is a place for people to rest in peace and you just spermed all over their land
Oh well. haha. i couldn't really understand what she was saying. i just nodded a lot. i guesss she found that sexy.
gotta love spring break
gotta love slutty girls from the south
Dude its barely eleven am and there is already a firetruck and ambulance at the shamrock...happy st paddys day
Is "blowjob enthusiast" a bad costume?
How does "I'm not drinking tonight" turn into body shots?
I was tripping balls on the bathroom floor and his dog walked in. The lights in his bathroom have motion sensors, so I thought his labrador retriever was Jesus.
When he pulled it out last night I asked if that was as hard as it was going to get. I think I may have offended him.
I'm like still hungover from the quinceanera.
That shit was hard as fuck. It felt like a mountain entering my vagina.
I might need to come puke in your toliet on the way home
Imma make him fuck me with my jersey on tonight while I chant Go Jets Go. Gotta love playoff hockey szn.
tonight's safe word is brought to you by the phrase "Ahhhhhh"
So the vodka/tequila mix went down fine but the burp made me cry
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