walkin around the woods blazed, drawing pictures of trees and plants, i get a grade for this
I don't think I can handle being a slut. There is a lot more emotional stress that I never realized.
I feel awful
Physically or morally
Physically. The only immoral thing I did was steal money from strippers while they gave me lapdances.
I kind of drew a blank when the doctor asked me how I got super glue up my nose.
You almost make it sound as if getting an education to further your career is more important than beer and tacos.
I had a moment while I was smoking where I was looking at these palm trees and I knew how dr Seuss came up with his characters.
I've discovered that regular handcuff keys, sadly, do not work on real police handcuffs.
He always takes me to get taco bell after we hook up in his car. It's sort of become a booty call tradition.
First highlight of the semester: campus safety caught me peeing in the dirt parking lot by kappa. Then as they were about to write me up, they recognized me, laughed, and left.
Thank you contacting dial-a-boner. Currently, our boner is on a run to service another client. You can either wait 2 hours for service, or share concurrent service with the current client.
Drive by water balloon fight on $500,000 boats ended when someone threw a dildo
YOU DRINK NOW BECAUSE YOU ARE A STRONG INDEPENDENT WOMAN WHO DOESN'T NEED A DRINKING PARTNER
He couldn't get his dick hard. So he started yelling at it. " EVERYONE is laughing at you, you piece of shit no wonder you can't get pussy" i wonder if that happens frequently I'll try again next weekend
I just fanned myself with my wet toothbrush to dry my mascara. Wtf
Have I told you i love you?
there's no need we are two peas in a naughty pod of fuckery
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