haha it's okay then, bc he only killed a canadian, they're not real people
i have absolutely no control over my now miserable and whore-ish lifestyle.
i don't care what you say, the winery is open and 10am is NOT too early to go barrel tasting
It's not prostitution until you're out of college. Right now it's just strategic boning.
Every time she shows up on my newsfeed, I get the taste of tequila in my mouth.
Im sweating champagne and woke up in nothing but a tuxedo jacket. What didnt go wrong last night?
I'm glad we're going to catch up. too bad it's over my vagina.
Hey so when you left last night was i wearing shoes?
If I had that in my pants Omg I would want a shirt made so everyone knew
Does he cat effect his dick pics to you? Because THAT is true love
I piss off the neighbors just so I can have someone to compete with.
time out. can we just pause the wholesome understanding friendship thing and be fuck buddies for a night?
we need a secret handshake
I didn't want to hook up with him so I just jumped out of bed, yelled "I don't even believe in god!" and ran out of the room
I think his dick was bigger than his dog
Why are you naked at 4pm?
Its my birthday, I dont have to wear clothes
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