listen. just hotwire a car, take off the license plate, make up a new one on a sheet of paper and go the speed limit. i do it like, at least 3x a week.
We can make salsa ya know, maybe even some hot sauce. That doesn't mean we're married.
Honey, If i waited till marriage I wouldnt know what a dick tasted like.
The guy I was getting with last night took off his purity ring mid-sex and threw it across the room.
Also there's a dick sized hole in my tights...should I be worried?
In all honesty of all my sexual conquests, his dick is probably my proudest moment.
Actually some of the best sex I've had involved a lot of laughing.
How small IS your cock?
how do you ask an olympian for your underwear back?
He's the conductor of the struggle bus
I RODE THAT FINE PIECE OF STRUGGLE BUS
Well I was going to go home but vodka happened.
There is an unwrapped tampon, a condom, a rubber chicken and a slim Jim currently sitting on our dining room table.
But no. So do not give him one damn penny. Unless they are in a sock and you are hitting him with it.
I know, dude. If he ends up having a tiny dick, I will literally pack it back into his pants and leave. Not worth the aggravation.
If you dont get laid dressed as Woody Harrelson in Zombieland, I have lost all faith in the men of nw Indiana.
that guy was staring at your tits.
nah, more like they were staring at him, and his girlfriend, and her less than adequate bosom. they pitied the fool.
point taken, oh mistress of the bosoms.
Randomize
