I googled Canada's legal age of consent. I have good news. It's 14. Justin Bieber here I come...
hey, when you wake up, search yourself on youtube
my sister already found it, were watching it right now. i give it 2 thumbs up.
Walk of Shame time yet?
Dude she's 6"2, blonde and on the cheerleading team. I look like Seth Rogen's fatter, unfunny brother. What shame am I supposed to be feeling?
I'm not sure what's more surprising, the fact that she said I reminded her of Danny Devito, or the fact that it got me laid.
fyi, she knows we call her the sperm bank. watch your back.
You cleaned out the gashes in your leg from hopping that fence with that whipped cream vodka, didnt you?
Good news. Isn't krabs. Bad news. Not sure what it is. Worse news. Encouraged not to fuck till known. Great news getting laid tonight
yeah, i found the sharpie that everyone use to sign my tits last night. its dead.
I damn near set my vagina on fire. WHILE The Flaming Lips played in the background. Intensely apropos.
It was easier that asking where the vagina platter is.
If you think hives from an allergic reaction to lube is funny, remind me to tell you the story about how I got a black eye from masturbating.
DO NOT TRY TO APPROACH HER CAT. IT IS A DEMON CAT FROM SATAN'S BALLS AND IT *WILL* TRY TO KILL YOU. I SPEAK FROM EXPIRENCE.
There's glitter all over his bed from my Pink VS panties... I think I might invest in similar styles as a way of marking my territory just incase.
well...I was at work...until someone dropped dead during their performance of "I believe I can fly". It was karaoke night.
She’s fine. Found her in the bathtub eating Cheerios and watching Rugrats on an iPad.
Randomize
