ahhh, you guys look like a cute little family in the cop car!
drank two beers while on the toilet at home during lunch break. new high or new low, not sure
I'm watching a show called "I didn't know I was pregnant" on TLC...Apparently this happens enough that there is a series
FYI, if you pee in my bed (or even let R___ and E___ sleep in it), I will fart loudly during your wedding vows. Trust.
His band may suck, but it's not like I'm sleeping with all of them.
No kidding. I just keep looking at that 'under 21 until 11/21/2011' on my id and whispering "soon enough"
I go to a class slightly intoxicated and they bring in a baby. What a life.
Guess who has two thumbs and just fell outta his car and almost peed himself
now that I know that you did coke with your mom I can't look at her the same
My backyard is filled with beer cans. You idiots turned our backyard into a redneck ball-pit
my throat is bruised, my back is scarred, my vagina feels like it's going to fall off.. you're like godzilla. you destroy everything.
You threw up in your own shoe then wore it home
ETSY JUST SENT ME AN EMAIL WITH THE SUBJECT "SUMER ROMANCE" I'M BEYOND FUCKING DONE
ill dress up as a sperm donor and you can go as the cup....
So I ended the trip with two cold sores, poison ivy on my leg and vagina, and no alcohol or weed. WORST. 4TH. OF. JULY. EVER.
Randomize
