It's like the water temple from zelda. but with more tits.
I have a very awkward question for you. Could you possibly take my black dildo. My mom wants to clean my room.
is it weird that i feel like i won the break up because my status change got two comments and his got zero?
the weed was in a baggy that had little penguins on it. i am so excited you have no idea
i realized really quickly that drinking a bottle of vodka and 3 crystal light packets wasn't the best idea i've ever had
I really super glued a paper bow tie to my body last night. I need to do less drugs.
I'm hoping he'll tell everyone how great in bed I am. Well, how great in bathroom floor I am.
The cab driver was nice enough to let you finish your beer in the car, but you crossed the line when you started to pee in the empty bottle
I guess I could probably fit that in between deep self reflection and teenage mutant ninja turtles
It's been this way for a few days. I had chick fil a on Friday so this could be an attack from the Gay Gods as punishment.
direct quote from andrew "you know i can't hear when i drink whiskey"
we def had a heart to heart that turned into a BJ last night
I apologize in advance for the amount of cleavage I'll be exposing your boyfriend to.
Currently on my Sunday walk of shame. Should I go to church?
I think the God that I only kind of believe in, definitely hates me.
Randomize
