I am going to invent a chocolate mix for sperm.
you were stealing lawn gnomes and punching cars. I'm not surprised you got arrested.
I told the cop it was my birthday and he said "happy fuckin birthday", handcuffed me and threw me in the back of the cop car.
You know you had good weekend wheb we you hook up with three different girls and you don't feel no pain when u pee in the morning
I see you've set aside this special time to humiliate yourself in public.
Nypd just made jon and hayes chug their forties.
That dick who always called me a slut in high school showed up at the clinic with boner problems. Then I was assigned as his nurse. Who's laughing now. I AM.
Those tiny little fruit fly looking mofos. They fly past the phone and I grabbed them like Daniel-San
Serious concern: will TSA confiscate my bondage rope?
You yelled "Everybody!!! Round of applause to Jill for not doing anal!!" Right in front of him.
The moment I was petting the giraffe was the moment I passed out
she was concerned about my dick piercings.
No I kepy moaning and just called out a name to make them believe I was actually having sex instead of masturbating.
We did hand stuff while watching teenage mutant ninja turtles so I guess you could say it's getting serious
I haven’t taken my socks off in over 36 hours. I should add that to my bumble profile.
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