soo apparently i was out of money so i stayed in the bathroom for an hour-ish passing out paper towels for money..needless to say i got kicked out
All I want for christmas is my sobriety back.
I just want to apologize for screaming when I saw you the other day. It's just that you looked really gross and I was high.
i just wasnt prepared to have the baby of one of two french firemen. threesomes are too confusing.
Cause I came home. Im covered in green marker and jack daniels. Theres a taco and the words "we went to Mexico" on my wrist. Im a walking abomination.
This makes me miss penis. Not in a horny way... but in a sad, sentimental way.
Just did coke off of a cross necklace and am headed to the strip club. Happy Easter!
Also. When I die, I'm gonna have them put me in the casket naked and then have an open casket funeral. That will be my last chance to make people uncomfortable.
The lady at the Humaine Society gave me her nephew's number because I seem like a loving and caring person.
Does she know that each time you've adopted a new cat in the past year it's because some guy stopped fucking you and you don't want to eat your feelings?
Tequila ran out around 11 so she let them do body shots of chips and guacamole instead
He put those pics of him with those girls on facebook and tagged his wife in them
Tequila 1 marriage 0
SOME DUDE PUT OUT FOR A MCCHICKEN AND YET YOU STILL WON'T FUCK ME
its not much but to go through all that to ask for half a balls worth of money was so stressful
Gonna do a few lines then clean my room so I can feel like my life is somewhat in order.
Idk if I want to put a bra on
Randomize
