he kind of looks like leonardo dicaprio...in whats eating gilbert grape
wtf, did you fuck a retard?!
and after you realized your puke was bright blue, you started crying hysterically and screaming, "I DON'T WANT TO BE A SMURF!" no more uv blue for you.
He was eating her out on the elevator. What a good man.
I paid your cover too so you're on the list as tits mcgee. You're welcome :D
The nurse who handed me my discharge papers underlined and highlighted do not consume alcohol while on my painkiller its like she knows me.
Did I actually say goodbye last night or did I just poison you with vodka and disappear?
Things bear mace does not do: repel bears. Things bear mace does do: piss off bears, give bystanders asthma attacks. Lesson learned
Eating an ice cream sandwich while your little bro gets me weed. May I adopt him?
The pigeons can smell the fear
Wtf
You were great dude. You wanted to charge the guy with fedora $100 to get in.
He specifically said I couldn't post the picture of him passed out naked except for a strategically placed washcloth. Where's the fun in that?
YOU'RE MARRIED. TO OTHER PEOPLE.
Did you clean his pubes up off the table yet?
You know that feeling when you wake up and your whole body just smells like a penis?
I gave him a bj as a thank you for helping. I think that's good.
this poor kid thinks hes going to have his first time with both of us
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