Go study a dick amy that's outrageous
We basically counted to 3 and then dumped each other.
I just remembered we were doing butt clenching exercising with bar straws last night
after watching ten minutes of "the decision," I conclude that King Lebron has more influence on America than Barak Obama. I love our countries values.
I'm way to drunk for this play. I'm about to run up on stage and drop the main character
Maybe STDs were invented to keep stupid people from having kids.
No more stories ab the wkend for co-workers... No one else found "and I didn't have pants on when I got home Saturday night" as funny as I did.
Dude. The amount of love and appreciation from a house full of stoners when you come home at 4 am with donuts is overwhelming. The kind of love to make Jesus have to work a little harder at his unconditional love thing.
I just want to pat him on the head, bake him some cookies, and reassure him that, someday, he will get laid.
I'm sure I'll run in to him again, there's only so many VA detoxes.
if i dont text back till morning its cause i turned my phone off and changed my password to something i wont remember to stop myself from drunk texting...RESPONSIBILITY
I'm sorry I tried to stab you. I just really wanted those mozerella sticks.
Please tell your friend to stop shitting in my closet.
You know what i hate? I hate when the ppl you drunkenly made out with actually want to talk to you sober. It just doesn't work that way sir.
It was like I was gay for pay but except being gay I became straight and instead of for pay it was for coke.
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