It doesn't have to be a walk of shame...just pretend he took you to breakfast.
No one shows this much boob at breakfast
Just checked my recent transactions online. Between the hours of 1 and 3am on September 30th, I went to 7/11 4 times. Unacceptable.
Fastest blow job ever. Though it was probably a good thing since we were in front of my house.
Hey. Hope youre not too hungover. Also, did you put a Christmas tree in my guest bathroom and cover it with condoms?
No. I heard a cover of "my heart will go on". This is not sanity.
You should kill a bro for me and drag his carcass home so I can study him.
It's not even close to Halloween but there is a girl in a nurses outfit. Twerk or twat.
The day i have a fb album titled " I have become a townie" you can shoot me in the foot and tell me to get my life together
I CAN FEEL MY HEART BEATING MY WHOLE BODY
I got really adventurous too. Like. Balls in the mouth adventurous.
Sorry, i'm on a strict diet of vodka and regret
Just woke up next to a hungry lesbian and a half eaten croissant on my stomach. Can you come get me?
But yeah, I am thinking that "Cake Heresy" will now be a thing
She shouldn’t care what consenting adults do behind closed doors
You do realize it was her husband you were hooking up with behind that door, right?
We should write a country song: “Blacked Out on a Sunday”
Randomize
