Twist it, pull it, flick it... Bop it was like the first time I touched myself.
so how much must it suck for him to know that the penis of his best man has been in his wife's mouth before?
captain morgan taught me last night that resee's puffs are way better when eaten straight out of the sink.
Theres a fat guy wearing a speedo. Someone just got puked on, and didnt even react. Whats happening?
I met her at the liquor store. I hope I'm wearing a condom
Dude, I went home and roller-bladed into her bedroom so I didn't have a 'walk' or shame in the morning..I wouldn't talk to her unless she refereed to me as Brink
He started doing the gator chop at my vag and said he couldn't wait to "chomp" on it later...and I still slept with him. I hate gainesville.
You threw up? Were you ladylike while you did it? I'm wagering that you were. Like a Disney princess. Like a "Puke Me Pretty" Barbie.
It's national boyfriend day supposedly, would it be appropriate if I posted a picture of my dildo?
This costume is too restrictive. The priest and I cannot get it on while I am wearing it.
Do u feel more socially accepted since someone else made up their girlfriend too?
Guy just came in wearing only shorts, on his hand was written - my name is ... Call ... And tell them where i am, thanx - in permanent marker, ordered his favorite dish, and left w/out touching it. It's snowing outside.
Dude my body has gone into shock from not eating frozen pizza and chips. I've been shitting like Richard Simmons after a night out of twerking in a corn field
You left a bit of molly on the table and my mom found it. She asked what it was, I said "not drugs"
She believed me because "leaving that much behind on the table would be a waste so obviously it's not drugs."
just walked passed a black light...apparently he DID cum.
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