i nerd-gasmd. plain and simple.
turns out gay frats are just like normal frats, only with more v-necks
she likes to give head while listening to britney spears, getting blown by a girl with headphones on is a nice level of separation
you wouldn't stop saying "oil can" in the tin man voice until I gave you back your flask
battery dying...get laid and text me after...or during...its whatever.
On the airplane today the pilot actually said "Ladies and gentlemen I'm sorry for the delay. But I know all of you have problems, and so do we..."
He kept screaming "it's so seductive" while he was humping the wall
and then the entire party sang the national anthem a capella around the keg.
Drinking franzia alone at noon watching a cheese themed episode of "The Chew" I'm ready to admit I need a job.
We found him. He was passed out in a McDonalds booth with at least 6 big Mac wrappers. The employee said he kept yelling that he was in America and had the freedom to have big macs. Fucking Italians...
You must take up my position now. You must pass out in awkward places as I taught you... Sears a hotel elevator and Burger King bathroom. You potential for greater young grasshopper.
The look of disappointment from my cat while I take nudes...
My goal is to have my roommate find me sprawled out in the middle of my floor naked and passed out. Maybe with some Alfredo chicken hanging out of my mouth. I don't know, we'll see where this goes.
learning about efficiency and effectiveness in an administration seminar. real world application: walking across the street to the pub on break to shotgun a beer.
I always knew ther was a reason why we're best friends
Obvs our love of drugs
I like to think of it more as our love of curiosity
Randomize
