Your lack of dick hurts my anus. I hate your loverboy tactics.
if someoen knew that someone accidentally drunkly kissed your boyfriend would you want them to tell you/?
followup question: what if both somones were me?
The night was doomed the minute I started taking shots with an apple as a chaser.
Hey if there is a better reason to go drink then "I've been fucking robbed!" I have yet to hear one. Also, I've been fucking robbed.
I am drunk please bring Taco Bell and sex
Never mind I found pizza just bring sex
I'm back in the dating scene now... Since the legality issue calmed down. And my stalking charges were dropped.
I can get there in 20, one question, Drress Code? Stripper Lite (make up may require an additional 5-10 minutes), Suggestive Professor (professor Kamil's cleavage ain't got nothing on me), Daywear, Dyke (and trust me you ain't seen dyke), or Exactly What I'm Wearing Right Now. (all of the above may arrive under a coat and are subject to my level of sobriety. Which is currently like nonexistent).--xoxo you know you love me, Gossip Girl.
to drive Frat boys away, one just needs to cat-call at them. It makes their masculinity weaker, and yours stronger.
It happened to me once. But i washed off in a duck pond and walked home naked.
I thought he was foreign, but it turns out when you're that drunk, an Ohio accent just sounds Russian.
Why do I always have at least 8 men with whom I am conducting some sort of poorly planned love experiment?
its been well over a year and hes still saying sex with me was epic
hey, so i dont know your name. but im guessing we had sex last night. seeing that you're in my phone as "had sex time thursty thursday guy"
I want you to worship my cock.
That's not how you start a conversation.
so i'm with my friends driving on the highway and just saw a guy in the car next to us sucking on a dildo. can't make this shit up.
Randomize