STUCK IN CAPS. WANA GET AFTER IT TOMORROW?
I wish you got a notification every time someone masturbated to a Facebook picture of you...
ill find time for any girl whos not afraid to grab my junk in front of 100 people
This sounds like "Sober" Ericka. Sorry that message wasn't for you. I only do business with "Fell off the wagon" Ericka. Please pass that message along to her.
Oh so it was one of those "I shouldn't have gotten in a cab with a random 21 year old girl" kinda nights.
I fell asleep with my vibrator still in me. I am the Queen of Sad Masturbation.
I have vomit stuck in my nose, you should come with a warning label.
He was having an allergic reaction to that new brand of vodka Eric brought, so he just started chasing with benadryl.. Talk about commitment.
Well u missed Autumn's newly 21 yrs old sister flashing her tits and standing on the bar last night.
Blow job season was short but glorious.
It's disgusting. He breathes through his mouth and just sounds fat. Plus he chews all loud and shit.
I know but at least you've never been asked to have sex dressed up like Catwoman
After sending me a dick pic, he asked, "yay or nay?"
Trying not to ruin Mother's Day with the enormous hickey on my neck. Nice.
have fuck
*fun
actually forget it have a fuck too it'll do you good
Randomize
