he looks like a really good dad on facebook
I have one brief flash of having his dick in my hand. that's all I remember.
all of your clothes are in the front law. btw..sprinklers go on in 20 minutes
I have a plus one for the Blackout Express, should I pen in your name?
Just found out my ex boss was running a whore house in the bar. Time to remove her as a reference?
The good news is the house is clean, the bad news is someone redecorated the bonus room by spray painting "free willy" on the wall in honor of the girl who passed out in there last night.
We simultaneously blacked out then simultaneously came to then simultaneously had sex with the neighbors. We're definitely meant to be roommates.
Most desperate stoner moment; dropped our hard earned resin ball in the sand, rinsed it off and then did knife hits in the kitchen cuz we broke our only pipe
Props to the guy blatantly doing coke in the bathroom at the bar. Walked out of the stall with a credit card in hand, sniffing loudly and shouting "choo choo"
Just woke up with an entire pack of Oreos in my cheetah onesie. I've been waiting for this moment forever.
She mentions her boyfriend one more time, I'm taking her home and breaking that shit up.
My fridge is empty and all of my food is in the bathtub. Just.. Why?
I have hobbies that aren't destroying myself and others...i can make hats.....
Basically we had a threesome in one room and a fivesome in the next room. Its what I like to call a win win situation.
Do u believe in the possibility of big foot?
You high??
Randomize
