How does she give head with a nose like that? It looks like she has a plantain stuck in the middle of her face.
they have a walk of shame score keeper on their fridge. I marked my tally for him on my way out..
I cant leave dude. theres a horse with a top hat on
With me living this close to Mexico now, Tequila is just a geographical choice at this point if nothing else.
Ohhh,that's true. Babies are only fun when you're high. Otherwise, they're the worst kind of people.
Just burnt my nuts with a cigarette. Don't ask. I hate life.
Bought asot tix too. After Saturday I'm gonna be reborn like Jesus and no drugs until edc
I got about 15 snapchats from you with your hand saying "you want cheese sticks" or something like that and one of some weird looking weed
I'm so pissed theres no male strip clubs around where we are staying I looked extensively
I just realized I wasn't at the party anymore. I was just sitting there with a vacuum.
A bitchslap is in order.
Kyle passed out in the tub after breaking a glass and shouting, "WHAT ASSHOLE GAVE ME A GLASS?" His girlfriend gave it to him...
I just want you to know that watching you throw up out of a cab in the McDonald's drive thru was probably the highlight of my night.
Hopefully he gets to dig deep into my body, before he digs deep into my past ..
I'm so stoned. We're making Josh's sister bake us brownies. She's so small and pixie like. Her brownies make me cry tears of happy.
Randomize
