Sex don't cost a thang now that you can buy trojans with meal points.
Bret has after-school detention for writing Brianna has a stinky vag on the ground at recess.
Got laid at the last second. Facebook chat is good for something afterall.
you know how they say when you die, your whole life flashed before you? well do you get to see what happened all the nights you blacked out?
she made a facebook for her toddler.. his likes include lil wayne and ice luge. He has more friends than i do. I mean, Seriously? there's not enough booze in the world to make thanksgiveing bearable
ARE YOU SAYING THAT YOU DON'T WANT TO GO TO A PARTY AT AN ADULT STORE WHERE A BUNCH OF HOT GIRLS ARE DRINKING
People are stripping in McDonalds. Do I join?
YES.
Don't patronize me, I thought of that on peyote, so it was basically like a message from God.
Do you know how many guys' fantasies I've been told I'm a part of lately?!
Just 2. But still.
On a scale of 1 to 10 how concerned should I be
I never thought my selfie stick would come in handy for nudes.
I'm more than my video games and dildo collection
Shut up. You had me at killer robots. Your place or mine?
Dude. That's like masturbating until the point that you're going to climax, then stopping, waiting for a few seconds and then starting all over. While that does lead to an altogether more powerful orgasm, it's still annoying as hell until you get there.
I was not expecting that analogy.
No one ever expects that analogy.
Well the cops were called after the kid fell, but we saw 4 cute guys from our window while it was going down, so it wasn't all that bad.
Randomize
