Does this mean you'll turn into an Albanian at the next full moon?
Ryan Reynolds porn could be a WMD. Have a giant TV on the front of your tank, and just drive around playing it. Everyone dies of orgasm overload.
That's it. Iraq is done. Everyone dies, game over man.
I'll just get wasted and start throwing myself at men. Someone's bound to take the bait
Did you know you could bring s cooler of beer to the nail salon?
Can you fuck me on the kitchen counter at some point? I'll lysol it after
I've just never had a dinner guest strut in, go directly to my bathroom, vomit.. then come out demanding whiskey and food.
Well at one point he got ahold of my archery gear.. And I. Shit. You. Not. Sarah took an arrow to the knee.
She legitimately thought I was hiding in the fridge, then she checked the second one to be sure
Just saw a couple do like 5 Sakai bombs and my dad goes "who says love is dead"
Why yes. I did get laid looking like that. My sheets look like there was a clown orgy
Out of everyone here, the sober one caught the cat on fire.
She tackled him mid-puke while the other two were cutting up a $60 dildo with a kitchen knife and putting the pieces in a Corona bottle.
What's his name?? He crossfits 6 times a week, works in finance & is into the occasional felony class drug. His name is irrelevant in order to know if I wanna bone him again.
Had to snap chat three different people to ask who left the bite mark on my thigh. All three said "Wasn't me". Now I can't wear a bathing suit to my mom's pool.
I appreciate the fact that you sent me a snapchat of your dick soaking in a cup of water.
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