It's not true, it's not true! She's too full of cheese to have sexy time!
Yeah i wasn't gonna go out but then i was like im not gonna get my dick wet stayin at home studying
I think I should just go up to him and say, "before I invest time in this could I just take a look at your penis?"
Does it make me a prostitute if I accepted a Life House concert ticket for giving this guy head?
No. It just means your good at giving head.
i was able to set 4 alarms to make sure i woke up in time for class but i couldnt take the open beer out of my pocket before i did cartwheels down the hall...
She hash tagged the word blow job in her text. Tonight's going to be good.
My period started right as he was entering, which really helped me sell the "I've never done this before" bit.
Jerry got outside again, i found him making dirt angels in the garden. I need to put a bell on that bastard.
I arrived home at 7am wearing nothing but my underwear and a fedora. I ate half a dozen deviled eggs. Put Katy Perry on repeat. And cried myself to sleep. We cannot go out on Thursday anymore
I'm cooling my balls with a beer because I'm too cheap to turn on the AC
I like it here so far, only people are a lot less accepting of my terrible decisions and it's cramping my style
Granted every 20 shifts of working there you seem to be on par to receive some sort of racy satisfying sexual encounter which money can’t buy
Got drunk tryed walking 12miles to zacks house woke up at noon on baseball park
What doesn't this kid understand that our relationship is not going past the blacked out blowjob I gave him on his birthday?
Would the comment "Down Goes Frasier" be too inappropriate at this time?
Randomize
