I just spent $27 on things to pee on.
I'm pretty sure "Like A Prayer" will forever remind me of drunk nights & pants down around the ankles
We are the drunkest people in Toys R' Us right now
I love having a boyfriend. I just ate pancakes with regular syrup and chocolate syrup, I havent shaved my legs in a week, and Im still going to get laid tonight.
fuck. you.
I just told my sister I love her. I'm in no condition to drive.
Apparently I walked up to him, mumbled something incoherently, then started to make out with him. Why does this always happen.
I apparently insisted on hugging all the bushes and apologizing for pollution on the way home.
We need large glitter to throw at people to signify our mystic nature
Fuck their feelings and their drinks they will get hit with sparkly confetti
He came over in a blaze orange vest with a case of beer and a shotgun yelling about "Dove Season" then passed out in the lawn. There he lies
Told the cab driver to take me to narnia last night. Turns out there's a bar called narnia on the south side of town. We are in business
I'm watching Russian dudes pole-dance. For research.
She's takin more dicks this month than I have in my life by the sounds of it
Morning! Got your 3am VM to remind you to get up for spin class and also confirm you were not murdered by the sketchy guy at brunch yesterday. So this is your literal and metaphorical wake up call.
If your talking about a poncho I WANT ONE
the twins are trying to figure out which one is the one doing body shots off a janitor in this picture
Randomize
