we're at Rob's house and just invented the best drinking game ever....we are on Chatroulette and everytime we see a dick we all have to drink.
Is it bad that John just came to my work to have sex with me bc I felt bad that he slept on his porch last night locked out and I missed all his calls?
The other night after we fucked we talked about Lowe's vision insurance. Never fuck a coworker.
Which is worse rug burn on your nipples or laying there after wondering how long you have to cuddle before you can sneak away?
Just me. You're probably having sex with her right now, so here's a reminder that you should be thinking of me per our agreement.
Trevor is horny so he just called me to tell me all the things that he would like to do with his future wife. That's a new one.
That's not your dick yours is smaller. Nice try.
Wait why do you have a pic of someone else's dick in your phone?
Things are very odd on my 29th hour of being awake. Thought there was a bird in my lecture hall and it was just a girl putting up her hair. What even
No offense, I mean I'm sure you rocked my world and all but I don't remember.
I encourage you to ignore feeling. Drinking more helps
You faceplanted on the railroad tracks and when I tried to tell you to get up, you told me you were "taking a quick breather"
I enjoy the company of your penis
you made the house rule that every time you'd say "yay" everyone had to drink.
that explains so much
Family acid trip. They're welcoming me into the family.
What. The. Fuck.
Family acid trip.
They tried to get you to drink water and all you kept shouting was, "NO MORE LIQUIDS OF *ANY* KIND."
Randomize
