It's Friday. Sex?
apparently they started giving me water shots and i couldnt tell the difference
remind me not buy ky at kmart ever again. Had to get a manager to open the locked case. then he stood there and watched me look through the selection
I hate that ur telling me this.
i was so drunk that there were 2 of her, and i didn't know which one to fuck
I didnt believe in cockblocking untill my roomate brought home that.
i don't know how it's possible. but i just bought groceries for a week with the money i made off returning empties
Lesson of the night- sweaty dick can get stuck to ice, and require medical attention.
The money is just too good to quit doing it. I'm using the same justification strippers use.
Listen. You seriously only live once... there aren't that many cinco de mayos left until someone knocks u up and u have to have a shotgun wedding. Man up.
I don't know, I think it's at least a minor achievement when you can light up with the guy who took your virginity and act like you didn't have and incredibly awkward sexual experience together
I may have just poured a honey apple beer onto a dried apple slice to rehydrate it. This is my day.
SOS YOU NEED TO TAKE THE CANDY PANTIES OUT OF THE GLOVE COMPARTMENT BEFORE MOM TAKES MY CAR
Having sex with him is like eating mayo. Don't think about it, just do it. It's worth it.
Grandma cant send me 4 lbs of gummi bears and expect me not to soak them in some sort of alcohol
Nothin much, just sipping warm franzia from a plastic valentines wine glass while wrapped in my Mexican blanket listening to sappy country songs and mourning my lack of a love life. Hbu?
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