he promised me brunch in the morning so i felt like it was ok....i really need to get a job.
fuck dude i blacked out on a tuesday. what am i doing with my life?
Winning.
My gift to the freshman: I made an illegal stop, rolled out and dropped to my hands and knees and puked in front of the south campus dorms and about 20 families. Welcome to OSU
its time to go be "that drunk guy nobody knows"....again.
It's 3am, i just got back from ht e bars and registered for classes larteeeeee. History of baseball at 8am? at least ill meet the only stragiht gusy at NYU!
drunk tastebuds have low standards.
Now that you're back together are you gonna tell him you set his stuff on fire?
I just spent 30 minutes cleaning out my coleman grill. Did you really have to have grilled yogurt?
Totally just drove past you riding your bike. I was like damn, that looks like a cute little hipster boy, and then I realized it was you and that I'd already banged you and it kinda made my day. I hope you're well. Come over soon?
Eight drinks in. Subject is fondling chips before eating them. Intoxicated texting has expanded from best friend to random guy I met in FBLA.
My knees are skinned from sitting on someone's face on concrete
Gay?
German.
Pity.
A to Z: fucking your way through the alphabet
It'll be a kids book
I went to smoke a bowl and realized that my lighter is out and there's still frozen blueberries in my bong... I need to reevaluate my life...
I hate who I am becoming
I think of it as growth but I also hate who I am becoming as well
Randomize
