i'm in the guys across the halls apartment. i think 7 MIP guy wants me. he just got a medical marijuana card. might be worth it.
Did we use protection last night?
Um, no...keep in touch, okay?
At what point last night did I start ordering doubles?
Right after we had the just friends talk..
YouTube is recomending me a video on how to make a home made meth bong, what has my life come to?
You wouldnt be able to explain the can of green beans in my mailbox, would you?
Excuse me but the alley way I wanted to fuck in happens to be a very nice clean area.
I need to find a more grown up way of dealin with a hangover at the office than pringles and mountain dew at 8:30 am...
We're drinking vodka. Wine is for people who have to wake up in the morning.
He said I was almost as good as the wheel chair sex he had the night before. Apparently I just cant compete with 4 wheels
yes i am an adult who snuck out of my parents house to cuddle with a guy and then came home and listened to taylor swift. judge me all you want.
That number that I thought was that dude's number...was actually my district manager's number. Fuckkkk.
You tired to make us "vodka tacos". Which was just you dipping pitas in vodka.
Any good?
Well. FUCK YA. But that's beside the point
I miss the days where our biggest worries were who was gonna win battle shits.
Guess who has two thumbs and broke her boyfriends dick?
He stopped me in the middle of a blow job to call his grandma for her birthday.
At least he has family values.
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