im letting my talent of no gag reflex go to waste
If my vagina had boots, it would be shaking in them.
I have this strange craving to see a really fat person go down a slipnslide
His fingers had 12 years of piano lessons behind them. my ex has been put to shame by a finger
i'm drunk and confused. there might be a 4 year old here.
She was stumbling around looking for her cat. She said i could help, but i had to call him by his jungle name
Oh and I found some acid for the drive back to school, productive day
You tried to initiate "Occupy McDonald's" when the cashier didn't give you enough ketchup.
I reek of vagina.. My cab driver commented.
I just want to eat Taco Bell and throw it up on his doorstep.
How do you get kicked out of 3 different Subways in one night..
Not very gracefully, that's how.
I feel like my sexual preferences are just another sign that I am a 75 year old drag queen in a 29 year old woman's body.
Saw the Peanut butter guy at checkout he had at least 30 containers of it and like 6 different kinds...
He passed out before we could have sex. I had no choice but to use his boner to hold my onion rings.
How does it make you feel that I can't control my vagina around you?
Randomize
