I thought she was going to get passionate and throw her on the bed and fuck her, but she just started breaking stuff.
That's the thing about women.
I watched the entire movie Forgetting Sarah Marshall before I realized it was in Spanish.
just hang any plant up and call it mistletoe.
i've been fucking this guy since february and just found out he might be uncircumsized. currently google image searching to confirm.
Andrew is trying to convince me that i took your virginity. Please tell me he is lying.
define virginity.
He offered me a 30 pack if I don't bring her to the party. Am I a bad friend If I take his offer?
Soo time for a life change, my 6 yr old sister made my gf a puke bucket for her birthday
i think i figured out where our problem might have started...when we poured more tequila on top of out margaritas to melt the ice bc they were too cold
hahaha or putting rum in the bbq sauce?
We made the bar tender tell us how he proposed to his girlfriend. In detail. While we made gushing noises. We are embarrassments to females everywhere
Dude. That is just waaaay to much random to process after that tequila battle.
I need a new pic for your contact id. Because your boobs popping up when I'm having dinner with my grandma or, ya know, when kids have my phone isn't so good.
why is there a chinchilla in our apartment, and where did it come from?
question nothing. DON'T QUESTION A FREE CHINCHILLA.
Whenever I see women with terribly drawn on brows, I just wanna tackle them and redo them and run away. I'll be Brow-lady. The beauty superhero
She is currently drunk and caressing my professor's face with one hand.
I'm worried because he hasn't removed it.
He asked me for a pic so I sent him a pic of my boyfriends dick.
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