How fat would you say she has to be before I can consider this a threesome
i was unaware that anal sex sometimes ends with shit on the bed.
I wouldn't necessarily call it an addiction, more of a passion. I'm habitually passionate.
Just saying. If you end up in canada tomorrow morning at least youll have my text to remind you how it happened
He just kept petting my ear and informing me that I wasn't one of the guys
I just figured you know how to drive a boat and I know how to get drunk. What can go wrong
Sleeping with two different guys who share a driveway is getting increasingly challenging to keep secret
I standby a snuggie being perfectly acceptable attire for drunkenly walking your dog at 5am. Our new neighbors did not seem to agree.
The guy I woke up with is wearing the same nailpolish as me...I need to stop drinking
I gave you a piece of bread to sober you up. You wiped your face off with it and then gave it back to me.
I think my hookup is starting to fall for me. Time to break his heart.
Sometimes I wish I lived alone because there would be no one to judge me if I wanted to have whiskey and popcorn for breakfast.
I love you as a roommate, but you GOTTA start using the door dude..
Can I get my morals surgically removed?
All I need is to get out and get laid
Yeah mom sounds like a good idea! Now send that message to the person it was ment for
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