The night began with "let go home early so we can study for my 9am final" and ended with "show me your boobs for a free pack of gum".My breasts are worth 14 sticks for a dollar.
i think the next time he gets me off i'm going to scream bangarang
ru fi oooo
you thought you were invisible so you started narrating your actions.
I made a drinking game out of watching your DUI video, everytime you say " okay, well thats just your opinion"
I wish you'd make everyone's lives easier and do him already. Then we can get rid of him.
The chips are stabbing my teeth, and I can feel the muscle under my mouth contracting.
I've fucked 6 of my brothers' friends. I'm completely fine with him fucking the girl we ate lunch with.
if I was any more soft right now, my penis would be a liquid
You know you've got awesome issues when the main deciding factor of whether or not to cut your nails depends on nacho consumption in the near future
I should rephrase... I'm trying to not sit on other peoples faces besides my boyfriends.
thanks again for a nice night (and please don't fuck my boss)
I just felt emotion and I'm not okay with it
Guy just walked into the bathroom with only socks on and took a 5second shit. It is taking me longer to type this than for him to shit, wash hands, and leave the bathroom. WTF? Still wondering why he only had socks on.
Accidentally made a bowl of macaroni and cheese with a bottle of vodka. It's not that bad
We could just stay sober.
No! We tried that once.
It sucked.
Randomize
