What do you think she thinks of us?
I think she thinks we're whores... but ya I think she likes us
That girl would be great looking if she lost 1000 pounds and cut off her head.
Three of the best words ever! Cocaine. Research. Study.
i kinda regret how quickly i gave it up to him, but i just wanted the regular fucking to begin soon. ah we made good memories.
I just noticed she took the "toys" too. That's how you know when it's really over.
I'm sitting next to some random guy in a gorilla suit drinking out of a bottle of vodka.
He's majoring in Religion
at what point last night did i decided to have a photo shoot with your camel toe
He gave me such a powerful orgasm I blurted out I love you. This is why just rebouding out of a serouis relationship is awkward.
I would ask what did you do but I feel like who did you do is probably more appropriate
I think I'm just gonna be a cat and wear slutty black clothes with some eyeliner on my face and pretend my ears got stolen by a drunk guy
my night stand is a mini fridge, dont even try to get on my level of laziness.
I told the cops they couldn't arrest me until they found my shoe. Now I have the grant county cops looking for my heels by the rail road tracks.
But like it was sooo bad! At one point he tried to flip me over and he fell off the bed
I was covered in mud from my knees down, I smelt like the inside of a port-a-potty and only had mascara on one eye. . . so you know your usual Sunday brunch.
I'm gonna write a book entitled "when you give a cop a cookie..."
I don't even want to know.
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