This is the first month I have not taken plan B to get my period in over a year
And somehow that makes me sad knowing I haven't had raunchy unprotected sex in a month
I'd give my left nut to see you
don't do that. I like the set
Her boobs more than make up for all the flaws with her personality.
Haha so I huess that means he's a little over 7. I can use my throat as a ruler!!
One less school supply you need to buy!!
yeah that always happens. i'm like the where's waldo of parties. i never even know where the fuck i'm at.
Right, because I totally see myself driving all the way down there to fuck his world famous penis.
My 16 year old coworker just told me I should take my job more seriously after she watched me puke in the backroom trash can. Fuck teenagers with morals.
officially hit rock bottom.. been yelling through the vent in my room to my little brother trying to convince him to get me water for the past two hours. i fear feeling the full effect of my hangover if i stand.
You were sitting on the filthy kitchen floor eating a packet of grated cheese, and you were crying because you couldn't find any cheese.. I'd say our party was a success.
I woke up with a twisted ankle and was covered in lube. Not entirely sure what happened last night
Even though I'm gonna be a felon I'm having fun for time being.
well, unfortunately the rug burn lasted longer than the actual relationship
Because you put the dick in ridiculously amazing boyfriend. And you deserve to have nice things happen to your penis. That's why.
I went to the hospital to have my arm checked out, and they already knew the story. They gave me props for posting photos on facebook before even coming to the hospital.
woke up on my floor using my jeans i wore out as a pillow
haha i wouldn't expect any less of you
Randomize
