i'm going through the NYU 2014 group looking for future drunken hookups. too slutty?
you know that annoying kid in my psych class? accidentally hit him in the face with a door today. perfect end to the semester.
your boyfriend is drunk and yelling to the bar that he loves his cats
we walked in to her beating him with a broom while he was trying to sweep ramen into a box. there were packing peanuts everywhere.
i drank out of my shoe...were you seriously expecting me to be the voice of reason?
I just scrubbed chocolate off the bathtub... You better have had a damn good birthday
her best friend is in town and she told me that they used to fool around when they were drunk and I'd have to "help keep that from happening"
you motherfucker
we are still finding bottels filled with his pee. tom almost drank the one in the frig
I know everytime I get my paycheck I'm like "I should probably renew my gym membership" and then I just buy more alcohol
When i left he was drinking an entire pot of coffee out of the pot with a straw. It's safe to say he's using a personal day
I yelled out look at all those hickeys. And then gave her boyfriend a high five
Hey your work video crashed my computer. The 8 pornos running in the other window didn't. Congratulations.
Why do guys insist on chatting me up this early in the morning? I'm just like "Dude, I look like the bastard child of Einstein and a troll doll. Let me eat my Hot Pocket in peace."
On a completely different note: my hookup and i are now in a semester GPA competition. Winner gets froyo and sexual favors. School just got interesting.....
Would it be weird if I bought knee pads and shin guards to fuck in my car?
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