nosebleed girl is getting lots of praise
I'm drive I can fine osifer
i think i will get a tattoo on my butt that says "im not bluffin with my muffin", but i guess if i was serious, i would get it above my c-section scar
No one goes out in public like that, unless they do anal
Someones car got stolen, everyone is yelling, and im drunk just sayin yeah buddy over and over again
STOP CALLING ME LADY CHLAMYDIA
Let's just say that watching the sunrise in a space helmet is really the only way to do it.
All my credit cards need to be pressure washed
I'm so proud of us for not dying.
Well, if worst comes to worst, I have pictures of his penis that I can put on the internet
I wore a bathing suit downtown so I didn't have to put on underwear, I obviously don't have my shit together
Van sex tonight? No need to tell me how classy that sounded.
I don't know why this person would ask for help. It sounds pretty OK to me. Also, I'd steal those bagpipes.
If you had a good reason for throwing the toaster at the wall, now's a good time to tell someone. My parents are on their way back and you know my dad and his pop tarts.
It was just like the old times. We watched movies and shit. But not like old times-i fucked her hot brother when she was in the shower? Times are a'changin.
Randomize