I don't know where I am, but I'm drinkin & I like these people
the #6 from wendy's when stoned is definitely better than sex. i dont care what anyone says.
oh yeah I'm gonna practice throwing up so I can be ready for Friday night. and Saturday. Beth is back, diaper and all.
my breakfast just consisted of gushers (made with real fruit!) and they're trying to tell me im not eating right?
Street performer on bourbon st just lifted a sewer top so I could puke down it. I love New Orleans.
There's strippers and bear every where so ether you gave me the wrong address or this is the coolest birthday party thrown for a seven year old ever.
After she lost the bet I made her get on one knee so she could "Te-blow me"
we drunk the bar out of liquor so the guy was selling us bottles of wine for $2a each. Only good thing to come outta this flood
Just promise me you wont die... or hook up with an old asian lady playing slots
Cant promise that last part. I won't die though
She was wearing my robin hood hat from Halloween shouting "steal from the rich and give to the poor, mothafuckaaaaas." We are taking her everywhere.
should I tell them that both of them had sex with me last Saturday? it might be a relationship builder type of thing you know?
I know my whole body feels like I belly flopped onto concrete. Seriously need to tone it down for a while
Sneaking the vodka in was the easy part.. listening to medley of puking in the porta pottys was not
I call him Seabiscuit because he's my trusty steed
And I'm laying here struggling with the notion that I need to put pants on.
Randomize
