Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(845): View more from New York

forget your mom, you can see her anytime. A one night stand only happens ONE night.

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(916): View more from California

Best porno line to date...."drinks are on me..." while she female ejaculates into a wine chalice

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(325): View more from Texas

That's what happens when you let Keystone Light make your decisions.

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(612): View more from Minnesota

three guys just busted into my bio lecture, yelled "happy st. patrick's day!", downed jagerbombs, and left.

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(267): View more from Pennsylvania

i knew it was time to leave the bar when i caught myself doing karate dance moves with a married man.

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(816): View more from Missouri

I believe you called it tequila and nipples. The proceeded to strike a pose.

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(905): View more from Ontario

I told you, we're just gonna get ripped and light sparklers

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(207): View more from Maine

But you can't tell me I give the best blow jobs and then not break up with your girlfriend who has fucking TMJ! Come on!

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(203): View more from Connecticut

There was puke outside of my classroom and lecture was half empty. Damn thirsty thursday is intense

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