do all gilrs hav hair on thier vagaina ?
Don't drive home.
Anddd after the worst sex of my life, he said.."do you mind taking off the condom, tying it up, and throwing it at the door?" Weird.
Best text conversation ever. Other than the one we had about using blood for lube.
Im watching hello kitty on qvc debating if its a good idea to cook bagel bites on my space heater
I just found out why they dont make table-dance tables out of glass.
Here's the thing. I'm really high and have lots of questions about lightning.
You remember those guys we called the police on after they stole our keg? Turns out one of them is a student instructor in one of my classes. Figuring out how best to use this information.
Sorry about that whole "setting your deck on fire" thing.
I know it must have been a hard break up. Are you okay?
Oh yeah, I'm fine dude. My vaginas heart is broken though. I feel bad for her, you should give her a call sometime.
I don't need to marry the guy. I just need some filthy, shameful wish fulfillment sex and then live out the rest of my life on the bean farm.
Ugh it's 2016, why can't our bodies just shed fat on their own
I did not pay that kind of money so that It could be hidden. that bra needs to shine in glory so that it can be seen by the world.
So I have three weeks to get rid of his girlfriend and fuck him senseless before he goes to jail
so idk what that means but now because of me he has a police file as breaking into my apartment and sleeping in my hallway under the carpet
im ready to get drunk and forget everything ive learned this semester
Randomize
