So you maybe wanna hang out again? I could use the $5
Whatever I can do to help stimulate the economy
Pls tell me she didnt actually sign a nutsack.
Asian chick on skype stripping for me. Hold on give few min
Her vagina smelled like bad decisions
she called for a booty call so i sent mike as my stunt double
Helped an old lady on crutches throw away her mcdonalds, carried her stuff to the car and helped her get in...most productive cinco de mayo hands down
Lesbian sex in an alleyway drunk.
HE IS COURTING ME WITH CHINESE FOOD AND IT IS WORKING.
She kicked in my bedroom door in only high-heals with a bottle of wine, announcing it was "cock-o-clock"
A little light bondage fun never hurt anybody (erotic asphyxiation excluded). Car batteries attached to reproductive organs have.
It makes no sense at first, you go with it, it's fun and entertaining and then a disaster
I told you alcohol was flammable, but you didn't believe me until you tried to extinguish your sparkler by submerging it in vodka and the bottle burst into flames.
No piss test, hell yeah
FALSE ALARM. PISS TEST. I NEED YOUR PISS.
So basically I really like drugs AND banging cops and it's starting to get complicated
Just an fyi, you also tried to wrangle a peacock last night.
Randomize
