never play flip cup with pint glasses
Denmark girl wants me to go out but i remembered shes a raging whore with extremely questionable morals. Not feelin that tonight
Why must guys tell girls who are a little bigger that "they like a girl with meat on her bones?" Yeah needless to say he went home alone
the fda needs to get their shit together cause these four loko going away parties are gonna kill me
I was just counting ceiling tiles when he ate me out, it was that bad.
Ok ladies its the usual spring break system. 5 for a guy, 10 for a non-lesbian girl and double points is its a group thing. Hottest guy of the day is an additional 15. GAME ON
Yeah, but he has adorable dimples and dimples talk me into things.
Someone came in the potted fern
So what if I got a tattoo on a bus, it was sterile.
I biked home blackout drunk last night, but I have some memory of throwing my bike in a rage when I couldnt get it down the stairs. No idea on the bright orange puke in the sink.
You told your family you're bi over the phone?!
We were talking about exes and it just came out....and so did I.
unless you want this visit to have a different tone... more romantic, less molly in a hotel room
I'm not strong. I'm hormonal, sad, lonely, and trying to get laid via tinder
I just ate part of my sock, this has got to stop.
Woke up to find my underwear in my purse to only remember I took them off at the airport
Randomize
