I'm not to broken up about it. Our relationship was worse than a coldplay song.
don't thank me. stop putting your penis in foreign objects.
I am one bad relationship away from having 30 cats.
That was an excessively violent trivia night
Fuck I am starving. I don't think I've eaten in the past two days.
You didnt need to. Gin is like eggs, its a perfectly nutrionally balanced meal.
Friend date it is then. Question: Can friends engage in sexual activities after dates?
I can pinpoint my loss of innocence as the moment I started masturbating with my teddy bears
I was drunk for 3 days straight...well wasted for 3 days with periods of "just drunk" inbetween
Dude if her licking my face hammered isn't love I don't really want to know what love is.
Thats Poetry
So Bodhi just sent me a pic of someone's balls with a message that says "I hope you all have a ballin' night." I don't even know what level of friendship to call this anymore.
Oh my god.
The ballsiest level.
I had to say goodbye to one of my fuck buddies last night. He's voting for Trump, we shouldn't be doing it anyways.
I'm sitting naked on my bathroom floor and it remind me of us.
That's my way of saying I miss you
You were out of control then you fell asleep on his lap for 30 min and woke up civil. Way to powernap to sobriety!
is it still the walk of shame if his dad gave me a 'thanks for sleeping with my son' head nod on my way out this morning?
We just started our own DARE program: Drugs are really enjoyable.
Randomize
