allegedly i woke up at 5am sat in the dishwasher and peed
Sitting in class thinking wow im glad im not hungover...and then i realized im still drunk.
I'm pretty sure my penis yawned halfway through. That loose.
She spent a lot of time to get her cleavage to look that good. It would be rude not to stare. It shows you are paying attention. Chicks dig that.
You kno how some people just need a "everything will be alright" pat on the back? I need an "everything will be alright" blowjob right now. Come over
I pull out like 90% of the time, but that's just to make art.
Accidentally hit on the same girl twice at the bar, she give me her number both times though so I think its cool.
Naw, the sex dungeon had to come down so we could build a nursery. Cause and effect really.
Can you get the drug form of snow for the blizzard this weekend?
So maybe I got drunk and hooked up with him in a hot tub? I mean that's nothing to be ashamed of, that kind of takes talent. I'd drown.
I literally farted midsex as a siren for him to get the fuck off me.. No such luck.
I mean I've only met the girl once and she was trying to slit some guys tires.
Update: I spent 10 minutes trying to fish out a rogue vagina weight.
When creating your wedding guest list do you put the girl you & your fiance had a threesome with under your friends or his friends?
Let's just say if my bucket list had "fngered in the middle of a club by a complete stranger while being sprayed by UV paint" then that is well and truly ticked off.
Randomize
