i think he might wanna be bffs again, but idk cause we're friends again but we haven't been bff since like a year. i don't know what to think...
wow. what a nail bitter. i need popcorn for this. brb
Just saw the true definition of the muffin top and camel toe all on one person at the DC zoo... Tried to take a pic but she got away..
I just caught myself dancing like an old lady in the shower. Have I reached the age where booty dancing stops and swaying of the upper body begins?
Which one of you FUCKERS filled the toilet with soil and planted my mothers daisys in it? NOT FUCKING HAPPY
gail simmons from food & wine magazine just heard me order my plan b pill
did you ask her what wine to pair it with?
im in his phone as 'great ass to tap'
you refused to leave the drive-thru at mcdonalds until the cashier took a jello shot
That was the most comfortable bag of doritos I have ever slept on!
Nicole, you can't keep coming over at 3am wanting to build igloos.
You walked away saying that you had to pee and you never came back. We found you an hour later in his roommate's bed. Under the covers. Still in your wet bathing suit.
Just watched my roommate stuff a sandwich in his pocket because we're out of paper plates.
My mom legitimately hired a private eye on me. DO YOU KNOW HOW EXCITING MY LIFE JUST GOT???
I'm graduating college in 4 days. I already miss the bad decisions
You spent the whole night conversing with your zombie poster, so I'd say you were pretty far gone.
:(. i have vodka in a fire extinguisher. that solves all problems. except fires. it would actually make that worse.
Randomize
